It's the universe

a start
it was once day that i considered fucking the great pydaras pyramid of giza. turns out you can't fuck a pyramid because it's not have gender. anyway, the zyhrly zyhrllos approached the pyramid and gassed the pyramid. turns out you can't gas a pyramid because it's not alive in a way. the zyhrly zyhrllos entered the pyramid and he got mad because the passage behind him closed. so he punched a wall and it shattered. behind the wall was a secret device that zyhrly zyhrllos didn't know what it did. the room with the device was average, like his penis, but enough about that. the device had like 50 buttons or something and there was an enormous red button that was begging to be pressed. but zyhrly zyhrllos knew that big red buttons are bad so he inverted the room with the ability "ernesdomaxied" and pressed the small blue button. then a robot voice said "you fucking retard fuck fuck fuck fuck you fucking fuckity fuck fucker fucked fucked fecal matter" and zyhrly zyhrllos replied with "eigwjgiwoifjksdgijsijiitgjwuetjejuewjtgay". then zyhrly zyhrllos fell on the sandstone floor because the pyramid started schaking like it had consumed 13 jars of sugarest sugar. zyhrly zyhrllos felt heavier, it looks like the pydaras was going up. afteer 65 dog years the pyramide stopped going and zyhrly zyhrllos heard the passage that closed open. then he started suffocating but since he's immortal he dint care. he went outside the pyramid and had noticed that he was standing on the flatline of the universe. zyhrly zyhrllos took a step forward and he was inside a neutron star. then a cat appeared and said "ey zyhrllos how u do my man". zyhrly zyhrllos replied with "i am ok but where am i in the universe". cat sayd "it's a me, mario" and disappeared. zyhrly zyhrllos went back into the pyramid, then the secret device room and mashed all the buttons. the pyramid suddently exploed and zyhrly zyhrllos was sent into a certain direction at 10^100^100 times the speed of light. he them woke up and realize his true meaning. a flash of light appeared in front of zyhrly zyhrllos and it spoke to him "hey cool you finally did something in your worthless life, here have a reward". zyhrly zyhrllos then got stabbed in the dick and the light disappread. zyhrly zyhrllos got really upset and went to sleep. after 14 minutes, zyhrly zyhrllos woke up and tried to summon a demon but failed. zyhrly zyhrllos penis healed and he began to evolve

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A new start
he evolved into "big ernest". big ernest was now able to travel anywhere in all universes. so he went into the retard universe and met a green fox. she said "hey wanna see my epic super duper amazing thing called DA which stands for guess what also im greenymix". big ernest says "didlo anallingus". greeny says "no you fat fucking fuckass it stands for dimensional adventures doesn't that sound awesome". big ernest said "ok why not i already want to die anyway"

greenymix led big ernest into a street corner and handed him a stinking comic. "jesus fucking christ why does it smell like 3 pounds of sock juice" big ernest disgustedly said. greeny replied with "just read it you fucking niggerfaggot". and thus he started reading. he saw how fucking stale and retarded it was and how you couldn't understand shit so after reading it he looked at greeny and saw how she was trying to suck her non-existent dick. big ernest said "your comic fucking sucks you fucking loli go die in my mom's spaghetti" and went into the rpverse. there he met the BAD (deltarune r34 rp). so he killed them all with the might of zyhrlling (he killed them all lol). then he went back to the retard universe. greeny was fucking muffet which doesn't really make any sense. so big ernest used his out-of-nowhere reality altering powers and made muffet a futa so muffet could fuck greeny. greeny cried "lol i got maxiEIJADOIFJSADJOGJOSDJGHJFOKJSAODFIOJAOSJOGJAIOJFOIJASIOJIOGed my ass ;(". big ernest laughed and made a snowman that proceded to fuck muffet and greeny AT THE SAME TIME :sunglasses:. big ernest travelled 10^100^100 meters somewhere and found drstereos zyhrlling the zyhrllos out of zyhrllos. this pissed off big ernest but he couldn't harm drstereos for some reason and tried to perma-ban him from the universe but couldn't anyway. big ernest then went to see david (big ernest also knows everyone in any universe) and saw him whyiennering_tragidding about pointless things. as a prank for drstereos he put david near him and when drstereos saw david whyiennering_tragidding he killed him in minecraft. david got mad, insulted drstereos sestemquadragintillion times and killed him. and thus, a cycle of CHAOS CHAOS started. david became jevil and drstereos became SANS GAMING and an epic clash happened. jevil did some random shit and SANS GAMING threw his videos at jevil and this went on for a while. suddently greny mix appeared and complained about his sore asshole: "big ernest, oyu retardaholic fuck five night's at freedy's nigger, i fucking hate you and your ass". greeny saw jevil and SANS GMAING fighitng and decided to fucking destroy them both with no effort. actually that was what happened in greeny's brain (it doesn't exist). what actually happened is that jevil and SANS GAMING destoryed greeny with FACTS (that he was a fuckign loser and he deserved to be fucked by ERNESDOMAX). greeny cried and left the universe for a month-2 months.

Part 3: the return of the king
meanwhile jevil and SANS GAMING were fighting, big ernest started to sleep because this was fucking retarded. oh look a dream. jokes on big ernest, just as he started dreaming the dream (Lol), he got maxied his face by the jevil accidentally. big ernest got fucking mad and gave a good whack to jevilas face so he reverted back to david. then he broke SANS GAMING mircopeni and he reverted to drstereos. the were both naked and it looked like it was one hardcore fuck except the semen is missing.

big ernest had enough of this and went into the weirdoverse (the universe). there he saw a shitton of enormous, huge, titanic yet useless numbers. then came weirdoverse. the fabric of reality started trembling, the numbers started to collapse, only the biggest stood in their place, and then appeared weirdoverse himself. there is no word to describe weirdoverse so just imagine mettaton but he looks human and he's gayer 10^100^100 times (maybe?). otherwise you could just say he was a frail non-midget.

"e tu pyderas nachuj" said big ernest. weirdo started crying in a corner and not feeling so good. big ernest then mentioned he wanted to punish drstereos properly because breaking his mircopeni isn't enough. then they both started creating a plan for 1 trillion and 5 years. 1 second after that greeny appeared in the weirdoverse (the universe) and went rabid and destroyed all plans. weirdo got mad and kylled the greenymix but nobody cared because he will come back. then weirdo went into an existencial crisis and hid somewhere. big ernest told the non-existent weirdo to fuck off forever and went into the MAXIIVERSE.

a land of beauty. MAXES were being made day and night and drama was rising and lowering every so often. this universe had no limit to the max album. there were currently 53221 MAXES in the accepted album and 13 of them were perfect. also fucking EPIX wasn't epic (thank god). as you might expect it, big ernest was interested in this primitive universe, just mindlessly editing an image in the most unique ways. the drstereos of this universe was tolerable at most but big ernest still broke his mircopeni for fun. iugjdfhuakfsdjhsdjgdgjsidgjikasojfdhojdfojgfhjdfojhijdsiofjsiohiosjdiojasiojfishfhkdhdf. woops that was greeny sorry. fucking idiot stopktisdjgosgujuisd nugguner.

chapter 4: the hunt
motherfucking cocksucking greeny

so anyway here we see big ernest slapping the soul out of greeny (...During the exposition procedure, the electricity was suddenly cut off, leaving Specimen 46 in the cell for a prolonged period of time. [...] Upon closer examination, the FOX appears to have completely withered away, leaving only a sad, empty husk.). big ernest, finally being calm again, goes out to hang out with RELAX for some time because the universe is fucking boring. he achieved inner peace.

after a while he feels that something interesting is going on in universe 53 so he goes there. he saw that the cactus of [] was being torn apart by the lords of anime: uwudavid and uwureidolol. he casually tried to whack them both but it didn't work. big ernest was hit with a toilet to his head and he got maxied. after some random number of hours, he woke up and saw that there was only a third of the cactus of [] left. if you didn't know, the cactus of [] is a special cactus (unlike pineapple) and it was originally grown in universe 92 but it was transferred to universe 53 due to the fact that the cactus was becoming chaotic. what i mean by that is that everything around it started going mad, anyone near it started hearing whispers. universe 53 is the place where the most resilient beings reside, so the cactus doesn't even scratch their mentality. after a long time, the cactus became inorganic due to it interacting with magic of goubar (you'll figure that out later) and stopped growing.

so, as i was saying, big ernest woke up and there was this huge bump on his head so he went to the nurse and she healed him to full hp. big ernest saw finally saw that he wasn't strong enough for some beings and he must put the cactus of [] back together because it was keeping the balance of chaos and order in check. and so he trained. like for quite some time and he barely saw any increase. the problem was that he was already max level so he needed to find gear, artifacts and similar shit to get stronger and get more stuff that will make him stronger. he started with the easiest dungeon: the reliquary of lehzar...

Final chapter: tavo mocios desrygalis
ok so big ernest went to the easiest dungeon and he instantly got all the loot and got stronger x93468185 times bcs the mobs were too weak and the dungeon just simply gave up after it saw him arriving. big ernest thought he was too cool for this shit and instead went to the library to learn shit. he didn't know what the magic of goubar is but he wanted to learn what it is even though it is completely irrelevant to the story. magic of goubar originates from a land named goubar which resides in universe 53. the magic turns shit inorganic so it stops any kind of growth but instead it makes the affected being stronger and tougher than before. "ok" says big ernest, "very interesting but i must kill".

big ernest went to the dungeon called tavern. he killed everyone easily and went to kill karciama but karciama sat on him and karciama was surprised he didn't die so he got the loot anyway. next big ernest went to the last dungeon which was pestbestnestjestest in the universes and it was called qwerty. anyway big ernest barely made it this time and he had to face the boss - big ernest. yes he literally had to fight himself. anyways he won because he had a secret artifact in his ass. he obtained the ultimate artifact "jew". it allowed him to believe in jew powers and obtain them so he could become one of the strongest beings in the multiverse. anyway he went back to universe 53 to beat the living shit out of uwudavid and uwureidolol. and he did. they both lost fatal amounts of shit and died. RIP 2 gays. anyway he put the cactus back together and started to go insane. "oh shit i didn't account for this" he sayied. he decided to put an end to this and activated his secret ability - youtube rewind. he went back in time before he became big ernest and right when this germanpasta started. he then proceeded to break his dick with a needle and fucking shitting niggering died. he became a ghost and possessed some dumb kid named greenymix. "wow i changed genders amazing" - proclaimed greenymix before getting fucked by muffet. ahe gao ensues and greenymix forgets to create DA. eventually boberov comes in proceeds to become omnipotent, destroying this entire germanpasta with his power and assimilating everything in existence. "greeny this is entirely your fault because you once again failed us all" said boberov. boberov then left existence, leaving only enough matter for a single big bang to occur. he will come back to this to see that greeny creates DA, big ernest fulfills his destiny and that everything happens as it should. and as usual, it won't because that's how germanpastas work.